The Birth That’s Right For You, by Amen Ness, M.D.,
Lisa Gould Rubin CD, CCE & Jackie Frederick-Berner

Almost as soon as the pregnancy test reveals a “positive”, family, friends and even perfect strangers all weigh in with conflicting advice on the best way to have a baby. Adding to the confusion are childbirth experts with books and classes promoting their points of view. All of this can mislead a woman into doing what she thinks she ‘should’ be doing instead of what is truly right for her.

Obstetrician/gynecologist Dr. Amen Ness and doula and childbirth educator Lisa Gould Rubin say that approach can leave a woman feeling not only disappointed with her birth experience but second-guessing herself. “Unless what she’s learning in childbirth classes happens to be exactly what she does when she’s stressed out or in pain, it’s just not going to work in labor,” explains Rubin, “That’s why so many people end up saying, ‘Lamaze doesn’t work.’ It can’t, unless it matches what she does naturally.”

Their newly released book, The Birth That’s Right For You, A Doctor and a Doula Help You Choose and Customize the Best Birth Option to Fit Your Needs, helps the reader cut through everyone else’s opinions on how she should be giving birth so she can get to the one that matters most — her own.

Like supportive friends who only want the best for you, this doctor/doula duo helps the reader see that she really is her own best expert when it comes to having a satisfying birth experience. And they do it in a concise, simple, non-judgmental way.

The Birth that’s Right For You shows the reader how to —

• Take a realistic look at her own expectations and let go of everyone else’s
• Choose the right labor and delivery team and labor setting
• Get clear on what kind of pain relief methods will work best
• Tap into what she knows about herself in order to tailor traditional birth techniques and advice in ways that work for her

The book is one of the few childbirth books that is completely supportive of the reader no matter what “method” she comes to call her own — whether she gets an epidural at the first twinge of contractions, takes a “wait and see” approach to medication, chants her way to childbirth in a birthing tub or any other option or combination in between.

Just as important, The Birth That’s Right For You helps the reader become familiar with the unpredictability of childbirth. It shows her how to navigate labor and delivery in ways that work for her when it doesn’t go according to plan. This way, she’s better able to cope when things don’t go the way she expected, rather than blaming herself.

“That’s exactly what we’re trying to avoid,” says Ness, “A woman with a low pain threshold who thinks she should have a totally natural childbirth because she’s been told it’s the ‘right thing to do’ could be setting herself up for failure. Our approach is based on having a more realistic understanding of yourself by fitting your own psychological and emotional needs to the choices you make rather than letting yourself be influenced by the ‘shoulds.’”

Amen Ness, M.D. is an Ob-Gyn specializing in high-risk obstetrics. He has been delivering babies for more than 20 years. Lisa Gould Rubin, CD, CCE has been a certified childbirth educator since 1985 and a doula long before it became a recognized profession. Their advice and experience has been sought out by print media such as The New York Times and People along with various hospitals and childbirth organizations.

The Birth That’s Right For You (The McGraw-Hill Companies, $14.95, 224 pages) is available in bookstores and online on December 1 st.